If anyone had told me that I would be a scribe for arriving last BEFORE 1130hrs at the appointed place,
I would have laughed! Well the laugh is on me because as usual I arrived early, but unbelievably I was the LAST
one there....and so I have the reluctant (but enthusiastic?) honour.
This was one of the hottest days in 80 something years here in Budapest, so the
Hash only lived up to part of the it's motto.....in that there was drinking but no running involved. I cannot
remember the last time I only walked all the way on a trail!
Smokey Donkey decided he wanted to try out some Rom Kerts, so off we went to the 7th District, where some
prolific ones are to be found. Surprisingly only one was open at that time of the day....and that was Koleves.
So we enjoyed a drink there. However we witnessed a dog being abused rather badly by it's owner, so Smokey
Donkey was quick to shout at the owner to stop it. A consensus was echoed by some other patrons too, one of
whom also exchanged some words in Hungarian with the dog's owner. I guess the aggressive dog owner sized up his
position, and had it only been Smokey I am convinced he would have challenged him to a duel, but sensing he
was outnumbered, in his wisdom he refrained and backed off. I am sure Donkey was ready to beat the shit out of the
dog owner, given half a chance!
So having saved the poor dog we marched on to the
next venue, which was Grandios (or something like that). Luckily this place was well shaded by trees so it was
comfortable. Indeed so much so that we ended up having lunch there, along with some more drinks.This time
with little in the form of entertainment other than watching a bunch of hung over young
Americans who had obviously just woken up from partying the night before.
After a relaxing stop, we marched on.
The next stop along this arduous trail was a 'local' underground in the 8th District. Again without much incident.
The trail ended eventually in Varosliget at Kertem, which was quite busy and a number of dogs were running around
happily chasing each other. Smokey Donkey was still thinking about the abusive dog owner, so decided to find
out how to report such cruelty and abuse. There happened to be a stall for the WWF at Kertem, so he went and
enquired, and was advised he should just report it to the police, as there does not seem to be a body such as the
RSPCA in Hungary! Jaws recalled that on the previous Hash some Americans had their car broken into and valuables stolen, and they
had reported it to the police. But the police had still not arrived over a hour later when the hash had finished
the circle, so what chance is there that they would respond to a call for animal abuse?
But then this hash has it's fair share of Rabid animals and victims of Rabid animals. And even Rabid GMs for that
matter.....And then there is the constant entertaining victimisation of 'Customers' experienced by hashers at many
an etterem here in Hungary! One just does not know whether to laugh or cry. I guess you laugh when it happens to
someone else and you cry when it happens to you!
And so ended the hash.
In the true spirit of a
Hash there was a lot of drinking, but the problem being no running!
On On
Jaws, the scribe
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Hash Trash – 17 July 2011
It was a beautiful sunny day at Battyhany ter and not nearly as HOOOOT as the previous Sunday. Those who turned up were like the Marines, “the few and the proud.” We had a new cummer, a visitor from Sweden and two returnees. The group was “Three Times a Weenie” and his lady “Maringay” from Scotland via Al Ain in the UAE, “Just Jake” from Sweden and the Phnom Penh Hash, Jurgen from Germany, a long time resident in Budapest but a first time hasher, “Pussy Willow”, Run by Batteries”, “Rabies” on his bicycle and your scribe, “Bang Cock.
We hung around Battyhany for a bit thinking that Kinga might show up, LOL, and then took the #11 bus to the end of the line on Torokvesz ut except for Nata who had her red formula one car and Rabies who had his two wheel chain drive vehicle. It was agreed that Rabies would be the hare on his bicycle and then Three Times a Weenie and Just Jake volunteered to be co-hares. They set out to set the trail followed much later by the pack setting out at about 12:20.
With three hares and one on a bicycle they did lay a ell marked trail. Even all of the false trails were marked with an “X”.(and there were many false trails. I can never understand how the trail can always seem to be going up and never down. This was the case as we wandered back and forth through the woodland until we arrived at the look out that is built like a part of a castle up on Kecske-hegy. We were still feeling frisky at that point so in honor of the trou de cou that we have in the White House I led the group in a rendition of “Father Abdul Obama”. There was a family with children nearby and they were much amused.
Following that, the hares took off once more and after an interval so did the pack. Now here is where it began to unravel. Again the trail was well marked but was heading (Head…who said head?) in an odd direction. We again meandered through the woods down to Szepvolgyi ut but instead of going up or down the road OR turning back to the start, the trail took us across the road and up to several “scenic viewpoints” up and across on Harmashatar-hegy. By this time all of us believed that Rabies had departed as the hare and somehow had smuggled “Baldric” back to lay one of his fabled “Death Marches”. As in the Lord of the Rings, the road went ever on and on and on. Finally, out of water and on our last legs, we arrived at the old bar by the Hanger only to learn that the bar was closed last month. We all collapsed but managed to get some water from the taps in the rest rooms of the Hanger which is now being used as a hall for weddings and private parties.
From there after many death threats, Rabies promised to take the shortest route possible back to the start. Unfortunately most of us knew how far that was and we had no choice but to stumble and crawl in the direction that would lead us to the beer. Rabies still took us through some more “scenic viewpoints” for which he was verbally abused. (No one had the energy to get physical.) Finally we came down off the hills and, wouldn’t you just know it, the final half kilometer or so was uphill an heading in on Torokvesz ut. (Too tired to say Head…Who said Head.) Now I know how the prisoners on Bataan felt as I collapsed at the end and learning that it was almost 16:30 or 4:30 pm.
All in all, four hours on trail I feel is a bit much however well marked it was and however interesting it may have been. An hour and a half is fine. Two hours can work but over that I feel is punishing for a normal weekly hash. Comments???
Praise be to God but while we were finding bits of shade and flaking out on the curb, RBB went and got us some cold beer to help us recover so we could drag ourselves into some semblance of a circle. 3X did the RA honors and did a good job of it. We also realized that Just Jake had been hashing for a while but had not been named. Since he was a co-hare today that qualified him so after much deliberation he is now known as “ Hard Worn Hymen”. Everyone was too fatigued to have a long circle and when the bus came we made our way over to it and back down to Battyhany ter for a very nice (but very late) luncheon at a restaurant whose name escapes me. It is on the same side as the church but a block away on the street along side of the market. All’s well that ends well.
ON! ON!
BC
We hung around Battyhany for a bit thinking that Kinga might show up, LOL, and then took the #11 bus to the end of the line on Torokvesz ut except for Nata who had her red formula one car and Rabies who had his two wheel chain drive vehicle. It was agreed that Rabies would be the hare on his bicycle and then Three Times a Weenie and Just Jake volunteered to be co-hares. They set out to set the trail followed much later by the pack setting out at about 12:20.
With three hares and one on a bicycle they did lay a ell marked trail. Even all of the false trails were marked with an “X”.(and there were many false trails. I can never understand how the trail can always seem to be going up and never down. This was the case as we wandered back and forth through the woodland until we arrived at the look out that is built like a part of a castle up on Kecske-hegy. We were still feeling frisky at that point so in honor of the trou de cou that we have in the White House I led the group in a rendition of “Father Abdul Obama”. There was a family with children nearby and they were much amused.
Following that, the hares took off once more and after an interval so did the pack. Now here is where it began to unravel. Again the trail was well marked but was heading (Head…who said head?) in an odd direction. We again meandered through the woods down to Szepvolgyi ut but instead of going up or down the road OR turning back to the start, the trail took us across the road and up to several “scenic viewpoints” up and across on Harmashatar-hegy. By this time all of us believed that Rabies had departed as the hare and somehow had smuggled “Baldric” back to lay one of his fabled “Death Marches”. As in the Lord of the Rings, the road went ever on and on and on. Finally, out of water and on our last legs, we arrived at the old bar by the Hanger only to learn that the bar was closed last month. We all collapsed but managed to get some water from the taps in the rest rooms of the Hanger which is now being used as a hall for weddings and private parties.
From there after many death threats, Rabies promised to take the shortest route possible back to the start. Unfortunately most of us knew how far that was and we had no choice but to stumble and crawl in the direction that would lead us to the beer. Rabies still took us through some more “scenic viewpoints” for which he was verbally abused. (No one had the energy to get physical.) Finally we came down off the hills and, wouldn’t you just know it, the final half kilometer or so was uphill an heading in on Torokvesz ut. (Too tired to say Head…Who said Head.) Now I know how the prisoners on Bataan felt as I collapsed at the end and learning that it was almost 16:30 or 4:30 pm.
All in all, four hours on trail I feel is a bit much however well marked it was and however interesting it may have been. An hour and a half is fine. Two hours can work but over that I feel is punishing for a normal weekly hash. Comments???
Praise be to God but while we were finding bits of shade and flaking out on the curb, RBB went and got us some cold beer to help us recover so we could drag ourselves into some semblance of a circle. 3X did the RA honors and did a good job of it. We also realized that Just Jake had been hashing for a while but had not been named. Since he was a co-hare today that qualified him so after much deliberation he is now known as “ Hard Worn Hymen”. Everyone was too fatigued to have a long circle and when the bus came we made our way over to it and back down to Battyhany ter for a very nice (but very late) luncheon at a restaurant whose name escapes me. It is on the same side as the church but a block away on the street along side of the market. All’s well that ends well.
ON! ON!
BC
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